The conversation around what was acceptable in the bedroom; what should be allowed and what shouldn’t, is all across social media and in private conversations, even though most won’t admit it. Many people weighed in on what they wouldn’t do, while others boldly confess that nothing is off limits when it comes to pleasing your partner.
Despite the varying opinions, the consensus across the board was that sexual intimacy should never be boring. Preserving the excitement in the bedroom, especially for married couples, seemed to be most important. Sex can easily become routine, and that’s not good. Maintaining a healthy sexual relationship requires creativity, invention, and spontaneity. Maybe a threesome isn’t your cup of tea, but here are some other ways to keep the steam, in your teacup!
Foreplay!
Everything worth having is better warmed up. We all know what foreplay is, but do we really? Foreplay doesn’t have to start and end in the bedroom and is not only limited to kissing, massaging, or sexual activity that precedes sexual intercourse, but foreplay can start in the morning and last all day.
The purpose of foreplay is to prepare the body for sex. But a body shouldn’t only be prepared sexually. Having great emotional and mental stamina also makes for better sexual chemistry. Send your partner something sweet and sexy through text. This doesn’t have to be a picture, but words can go a long way.
Prepping the imagination for what’s to come is foreplay. Flirting is also considered a form of foreplay. It’s those tender kisses in the morning to those sexy touches throughout the day that cause our sexual nature and desires to erupt. Flirting should never stop in a sexual relationship. It’s all about keeping the mind and emotions set on the sexual intimacy that will come later. Try this. I guarantee you, it works!
Looking the Part!
Sometimes looking the part can go a long way. Ladies, if this means dusting off those stored away lingerie pieces and nighties, then do it. When we feel sexy, we tend to…
act out on what and how we feel. Not only will it have your partner’s eyes glued to you, but it will also boost your confidence and allow you to creatively and freely express yourself sexually.
Men, you’re not off the hook just yet. There are sexy ways you can dress up too. Find out what your partner likes and try it out. Don’t be shy when it comes to pleasing your partner. Don’t forget to have a striptease session before the finale!
Playing the Part!
Role-playing is growing more and more popular. As I mentioned earlier, good sex requires a healthy imagination. One way to grow that imagination is through the act of role-playing. This could be a Dirty Cop or Sexy School Girl, but it can also be building a sexual form of communication. Express to your partner what you want and how you want it. Don’t be shy!
Allow them to use their words to turn you on, too. Being ‘active’ in “sexually active” is the part we sometimes forget. This means being intentional with your desires and learning to communicate that to your partner verbally, and physically.
Sex Toys Can Bring You Joy!
We know this topic is taboo–as no one wants to admit that they use or want to use sex toys in their bedrooms, but it’s actually nothing to be embarrassed about. Essence published a great article on the 10 bedroom Sex Toy Must-haves.
Keeping it Sexy in the Bedroom, doesn’t mean you have to stay in the bedroom!
Be spontaneous. There are plenty of places inside of your home where having sex can seem
like a different adventure. The bathroom shower is one, definitely. Also, the kitchen cabinet, bedroom closet, backdoor patio, or even the living room floor, are exotic places that can elevate your sexual experience.
Sometimes maintaining sexiness in our bedrooms is right at our own fingertips. Doesn’t have to be an outrageous adventure, unless that’s your thing. But keeping in mind what makes you attracted to your partner and doing things you’ve always done, is the definite way to keeping the spice in the bedroom. Be Creative. Be Spontaneous. And Don’t Be Shy!
Feeling frisky? Give one of these a try!
Abril Green (Edwards) is an author, spoken word artist & motivational speaker; founder of #BumpyButNotBlocked Ministries & Spoken WorDship where she spits “Poetry with A Purpose”. Currently a Literacy Interventionist at Chicago Public Schools, Abril believes “the greatest relationship outside of Man and His Higher Power, is between a Pen and HER Paper.”
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