This ain’t your grandma’s dating scene.
In just a decade or so, the way people meet, date, and become partners has drastically changed. With nearly 30 percent of spouses today reporting having met online, it’s obvious that traditional dating is fading. While the tried-and-true methods of the past still exist, many people are going digital.
Are you recently divorced? Did you just get out of a long-term relationship? Did your spouse or partner die? Heck, are you just looking to find ‘the one’?
No matter your circumstances, understanding today’s dating game is crucial to success.
Let’s cover six ways that game has changed and how you can make the most of it!
Back in the good ol’ days, you’d meet someone out and about at a social event or through a chance encounter. Maybe your friend or family would hook you up, putting in a good word on your behalf.
Nowadays, however, the online scene has gotten huge. There are compatibility scores, filters, and all kinds of algorithms that measure preferences, characteristics, and everything else.
The options are seemingly endless. You’ve got platforms like Bumble, Tinder, Match.com, OKCupid, eHarmony, and so much more.
So get in there! Set up a profile, be honest about yourself and what you seek, and put your best foot forward. Just be sure to make your bio stand out, and of course, use a tip-top photo to show off those good looks!
Speaking of showing off, the digital age is all about highlighting your strengths. In other words, personal branding. Turns out, this concept isn’t just for social media stars or big-time celebrities. Whether it’s Facebook, a dating website, or even sending emails, your digital personality is whatever you make it.
So make it unique! Highlight your distinct talents and traits. Make your values clear, be forthcoming, and let people know why there’s nobody quite like you.
Just don’t fake it. The last thing you wanna do is pretend to be something you’re not, and then you get on a date, and the other person feels totally misled…
RELATED: 15 Questions You Should Ask Anyone You’re Dating
Sounds pretty fancy, huh?
Well turns out, that most modern dating apps/websites employ algorithms, which are basically complex instructions for getting a solution. In this case, that solution is matching you with the perfect partner.
Basically, these algorithms analyze data based on all the information you convey, trying to sync your relationship goals, interests, and values with someone similar.
Just be careful. Not everything can be solved by an algorithm. It’s important to listen to your intuition as well, even if some ‘compatibility score’ tells you you’re only 45.23 percent aligned.
The main thing is to have fun.
Don’t fear failure, and enjoy the process. You’re probably not going to find the right match on the first date, so be open to taking risks and seeing how people really are in the flesh and blood. Actually, dating multiple people is not that rare. If you’re exploring the scene, getting practice can go a long way.
Mix it up. Go to a restaurant. See a movie. Do something physical like hiking or a game of pickleball. Whatever the activity, get a feel for it. Does it feel natural or forced? Are you having a good time? Can you envision being with this person?
Know your goals – whether a potential spouse or just a casual relationship – and don’t be afraid to pursue them!
For better or worse, texting and instant messaging are big these days.
Not a big fan and prefer to talk on the phone? Make that known. Again, be honest and open on your profiles, and this can ensure you find someone who feels and thinks like you. But don’t be afraid to try ‘new age’ modes of communication.
Texting is a great, non-intrusive way to build a connection. The trick is to communicate your boundaries while respecting the other person’s as well.
Everyone’s different. Some people get right to ‘sexting’ while others are more traditional and modest. Whatever you do, stick to your values, and don’t be pressured. This will ensure you align yourself with someone who truly appreciates you for you.
RELATED: Signs Black MEN Should Look For On The First Date
Thanks to modern dating, it’s easier than ever to find people with all kinds of unique beliefs, attitudes, and behaviors. If you’re not into traditional gender roles or relationship dynamics, there’s somebody out there just like you.
At the end of the day, dating in today’s ‘market’ is all about using the tools and tech at your disposal. While you may be slow to warm up to it, you never know.
You may just find that the partner of your dreams is just a click away…
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