Bipolar depressive disorder (BPD) is an illness characterized by its peaks and valleys. A bipolar patient may feel like themselves one day and the next day they can encounter a debilitating depressive episode. While this creates instability and challenges for a BPD patient, it is also an obstacle for those that love them.
As with most chronic or debilitating illnesses, it can be easy for the patient’s loved ones to see their disorder first, and the person second. This can be isolating for the patient and damage the relationships around them. There is a way to both honor the patient and recognize how the disorder affects them without erasing the individual.
READ: 6 Reasons Bipolar Patients Don’t Take Their Medication
The basis of empathy is simply knowing. If you have no knowledge of what your loved one is experiencing, then it’s there is no possibility for you to empathize or understand them.
Once you discover the diagnosis, take the time to find information for you to better understand. Use reliable sources like WebMD or Healthline to read about the symptoms, health risks, interventions, and possible side effects of any medication. Getting this information from reliable sources gives you an objective overview of the disorder.
Additionally, check out online forums or social media from those who are vocal about BPD. What are they posting about? What concerns them? Looking through this information provides an inside view into the day-to-day experience.
Finally, talk with your loved one if they are willing to share. Express that you want to better understand what they are experiencing so that you can be as supportive as possible. Do not force this discussion – it may take time for them to be able to put their feelings and actions into words.
Defining a person by their disorder is damaging to not only the patient, but your relationship with them. While their diagnosis may be a
pivotal and prominent event in their life, it does not swallow the person’s identity. Your loved one is still the same compassionate, funny, creative, or generous person that you know.
A diagnosis is simply an indicator that leads to recognition, treatment, and understanding for their symptoms. These diagnoses give patients answers to their doubts and fears – which is also the first step to healing.
While the healthcare professionals help treat the disorder, loved ones are there to offer support and hopefully provide a sense of consistency in the chaos. Think about different activities or interests that you share with your loved one. Do you both like to take bike rides together? Do you all like crafts? Think about shared hobbies or challenge each other to try something new. This quality time together not only strengthens the bond, but also might help your loved one feel more supported and seen.
READ: 10 Overlooked Signs They May Be Bipolar
Everyone needs support – whether you think you’re struggling or not. Just as finding support is essential for patients, it can also be a lifeline for friends and family. Support can come in many forms. Lean on other friends and family members that can understand the situation you’re going through.
Be careful not to become emotionally dependent on those close to you nor dump all of your problems onto them. If you’re also struggling with stress, guilt, or depression; consider getting a therapist. This can be a therapist specialized in specific mental illnesses or a family therapist who can provide a good perspective on how your healing interconnects with the healing of your loved one.
Bipolar depressive disorder can be an isolating disease. The patient not only struggles with the effects of being bipolar, but also judgment from others and even themselves. Support your loved one by seeing them fully. Not as their illness nor the diagnosis. Bipolar depressive disorder explains a chapter of their story, but not the full thing.
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